The Anti-Defamation League publishes a "Know Your Rights" guide with detailed instructions for how to handle encounters with the police. That's not the funny part. It's handy, and it has dedicated sections for walking down the street, getting pulled over in your car, police knocking at your door with a warrant, and situations like that. It also has a section for airline travel, and that's where it gets more interesting.

The opening is about security searches in airports, and it covers fascinating questions like whether the TSA screeners can force travelers to remove their religious head coverings. So far, so good. And then, the guide arrives at the following question: "What if I've been listed on the government's no-fly list?" It lists all the ways to complain to the government, and then it contains the following line: "If you think there may be some legitimate reason for why you have been placed on a list, you should seek the advice of an attorney." Yes, if you're a terrorist and the government knows about it, you're probably gonna need a good lawyer.

Unrelated Rosh Hashanah funny, from the synagogue's informational e-mail about services: "The Public Health Department believes this will be a special year for influenza." As in, influenza is turning 16, and we're all very happy for her. We hope you'll be able to attend her party...